Quite recently, or perhaps sometime soon (I can never recall exactly the correct directional flow of time, in the same way as just telling me to GO EAST leaves me confused as to whether I should turn left or right or some other direction betwext), I was/will be contracted by the government/a private contractor to investigate/instigate an anomaly upon the moon. This album tells/will tell the tale/told of this extraordinary event/apocalyptic horror, both in the dimension of musical sounds and, in an unauthorised account by an understanding bystander, the written word (with 11 original illustrations and a postcard).
Yours in shock,
PS: The accompanying pamphlet also contains highly accurate lyrical transcriptions; a chronicle of further adventures (never musically acknowledged); extracts from my fortnightly job search diary; 2 recipes; 3 interviews; 4 spelling mistakes; and several mysterious holes.
TEN COPIES AVAILABLE.
Includes unlimited streaming of The Smoking Moon
via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
ships out within 2 days
the telephone rang and the machine awoke and after the beep, a grave voice spoke
saying my assistance had been requested. I pricked up my ears, interested.
the voice asked for me by my full name and implored me to pick up, if I was game.
I did, and asked why I was required? the simple response: "the moon is on fire."
I dropped the handset, slightly scared, drew the curtains and up I stared.
binoculars hung by my side, but I could see with unaided eyes...
it was exactly as I feared; a smoking ball, with no atmosphere.
I turned on the radio, checked the news. scientists were quite confused:
how could the moon's surface burn... with no supply of oxygen?
I understood now why they needed me; I know the moon quite thoroughly.
my expertise was quite unique; I travel there once or twice a week.
I'm usually the first to know if something changes on that dusty globe,
if anything stirs beneath the crust then I'm notified by people I trust.
for something this big to go unspoken informed me that the system was broken.
I picked up the phone, lowered my chin
closed my eyes and said