Quite recently, or perhaps sometime soon (I can never recall exactly the correct directional flow of time, in the same way as just telling me to GO EAST leaves me confused as to whether I should turn left or right or some other direction betwext), I was/will be contracted by the government/a private contractor to investigate/instigate an anomaly upon the moon. This album tells/will tell the tale/told of this extraordinary event/apocalyptic horror, both in the dimension of musical sounds and, in an unauthorised account by an understanding bystander, the written word (with 11 original illustrations and a postcard).
Yours in shock,
Toby
PS: The accompanying pamphlet also contains highly accurate lyrical transcriptions; a chronicle of further adventures (never musically acknowledged); extracts from my fortnightly job search diary; 2 recipes; 3 interviews; 4 spelling mistakes; and several mysterious holes.
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lyrics
I woke in a smoking crater
the remains of pan nedrex
a small crowd stood and stared
as I emerged from the wreck
slow applause began, at first
and then a wave of cheers
the general stood at my side
his eyes awash with tears
"we saw everything", he said,
"using satellite video"
"you saved the Earth AGAIN", he said
"how can we ever repay you?"
"I don't need any thanks", I said
"I only did my part"
"besides, any excuse to kill a wizard...
and eat
his
heart"
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